Fuck Christmas as we know it.

I know several people on my friends page have linked to the stories about the trampling death (possibly deaths - I cannot confirm or not whether the pregnant woman caught in the crush miscarried) at Wal Mart, and the shootings at Toy-r-Us.  I hope Wal Mart gets slapped with a lawsuit the size of Texas for not hiring security and putting up cordons and issuing entrance numbers.  They had mob problems last year, so they can't pretend they didn't know the levees could fail.  Though they will try anyway.  The dead employee was just a temp anyway, right?

Fuck this Christmas nonsense.  War on Christmas?  You bet.  I'm tired of this mandated-consumerism, everybody pretend to be the perfect family and prove you love each other by buying loads of sweatshop-manufactured crap and do it right now or you're to blame for the economy tanking bullshit.  In the name of Jesus.  Or something.

Have the holidays always been this bad?  Is it just the cynicism of age wearing off the power of the beautiful shining lights and extra-large helpings of sugar?  Or are we really getting worse each year?

Why can't we actually have holidays - breaks from the daily workload, time to reflect with the people we want to spend time with, whether biological family or no, to exchange meaningful gifts if we want to and can afford to, but no obligations to?  Share a meal and leisurely time together, and leave the big box frenzies out of it?

I used to love the holidays.  I loved the decorations, and the special music, and even the people who hated to cook the rest of the year dragging out their favorite recipes and making something they were proud of to share.  I'd like to love the holidays again.  How?

I'd like to spend time with friends and select members of my family.

I will not spend time around family that I do not feel comfortable around.  If I wouldn't spend time with them on any random day, I'm not sharing Christmas with them.

Decorations are good.  I haven't decorated for Christmas in four years.  I should decorate this year.  Shiny is always good. 

I do like to buy gifts when the perfect one for someone jumps out.  I will shop local, or make them myself.  I'm not supporting any big-box nonsense.  I don't buy my daily things there because of the labor and importing policies, I'm not going to change that for Christmas.  

I do not want anyone to feel like I expect a gift.  I do not.  If you would like to, that it nice, but your time and friendship mean more to me.  I don't need stuff.  What stuff I do "need" I can get for myself.  Let's go to dinner, or share a conversation and a bottle of wine at a party.  Let's look silly dancing to kid's Christmas music.  Those are gifts.  Stuff is stuff.


I hate Black Friday.  Thursday we're supposed to give thanks for what we have, Friday we're supposed to spend the day fighting other people for more stuff?  What the holy fuck is wrong with us?

Creepy is...

...sitting behind the counter at my lovely little bookstore listening to a CD I've had stuck in my head for a week or so, hearing the volume decrease, and turning around to watch the stereo turning itself down.  Knob turning, number changing on the display.

Maybe I should get a new CD stuck in my head, the store is obviously tired of this one.

We also have a corner where the books like to jump off the shelves.  Just one corner, and usually just one book, but never the same book, will be on the floor when I come in in the morning.  Carol says this has been happening since the store moved to the new place.